ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
i feel sorry for the hotel staff that makes the bed after we have sex
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
I never actually go in the club. I get in line, hit on a chick, and convince her to come drink all she wants for free at my house.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
Tinder in Coventry is like browsing a gallery of mugshots from Azkaban
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
