Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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