We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
i feel like i'm a professional at blowjobs i can deep throat an entire spatula
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
When u wake up, don't be alarmed by the passed out mariachi band, they're cool. Muchos gracias
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
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