who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
You remember that guy i fucked in Ireland who stopped in the middle to talk about why he had 8 pillows on his bed? Yeah he's following me on twitter...
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
I'm totally picking out my shrooming outfit and blankets right now
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Randomize
