She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
You were laying in bed whispering and crying to the half eaten burrito saying "why am I shitting so much" and "what did I do to deserve this"
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
The struggles of a small town man whore
nobody put me to bed and I ended up peeing on a tree and got written up
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
Randomize
