Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
Randomize
