Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
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