what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
just wokeup with my ethics textbook on my chest, animal crakers in my mouth and my dick in my hand. even aristotle doesn't have a theory for this one
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
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