i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
Randomize