Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
I seem to have left my pride at pride
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
My biggest accomplishment thus far this summer is having sex 5 weeks after hip surgery.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
Hold on...did you Instagram a picture of you and your boyfriend while you were sending me dirty snapchats?
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
I woke up under a house in Key West
Randomize
