So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
A respectable fucking: good but like I don't want to get kicked out of my hotel room
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Randomize
