After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
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