She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
only you would photoshop your dick
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
We just had sex in the shed while having a conversation about cheeseburgers...so that's how my day is going
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
Randomize
