this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
You need Xanax blowdarts
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
How the fuck did I get back? Last thing I remember is being on some hot guy's shoulders yelling at girls shaking their asses
We'll talk about it later...
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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