happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
Randomize
