I like to think it a success when the cops are called
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
you called me at 4 in the morning to tell me that your toaster burnt your english muffin, and that you "fuckin hated that thing."
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
If letting him bang me while i'm wearing reindeer antlers and a painted red nose isn't the christmas spirit, I dont know what is
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
Randomize
