i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
Waiting outside the STD clinic 30 min before it opens already in a line up. It's like were all waiting for a concert that no ones really pumped for
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Randomize
