we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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