i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
Um, so I couldn't say it in person, but if you find my underwear in your office. Sorry. I couldn't find them, so yea.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
Please take a moment of silence for the fact that I still have all 10 fingers
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
