Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
Why the fuck was there a shirtless Mexican in my apartment this morning?
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
Slugs feel like vagina... thought you would want to know
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
In preparation for st patty's day I finally had a shamrock shake, and I invested in an app that will apparently keep me from drunkenly texting you pictures of my tits this weekend. Please let me know if you want to not be put on the "forbidden" list!
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Randomize
