ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
life is all about the fine print - all i wanted was a fucking pony.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
Yeah i'd say someone being in the room while you're doing someone makes them eligible for fb friendship
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
