this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
You brought string cheese to the strip club
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
I had to say goodbye to one of my fuck buddies last night. He's voting for Trump, we shouldn't be doing it anyways.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Randomize
