I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
i saw a guy balancing a black cat on his head last nite
get a pic
i tried he was too far away anotherguy was walking with paper bags on his feet explain that
i want ur life
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
Nevermind, there are three drinks waiting at the bar for me. I cannot disappoint this alcohol.
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
I can feel your judgement through the phone
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
Access to a Target is paramount to my general happiness and self-worth.
Randomize
