your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
So apparently last night I was running around columbus circle station screaming that Obama was a pussy and that "waterboarding should always be an option" lol
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
Randomize