If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize
