Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
I woke up under a house in Key West
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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