she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
Priorities: waking up on your doorstep desperately clutching half a meatball marinara but with no sign of your keys, purse or housemate. Where are you?!
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
