I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
Randomize
