At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
i asked him to tell me something nice and he said "your vagina is really tight."
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
Currently bleeding through my leggings. Not good. Not good at all.
Hospital.
I am invincible.
I booty called her while she was in labor.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
Randomize
