The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
Stay strong! Remember we're too uncoordinated to be strippers to make money instead of being a nurse
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Randomize
