Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Randomize
