We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
Who takes their shirt off at the bar?! Classy broad
I do. In all fairness there was someone else's blood on it.
Just found out that guy A from the threesome I had is now dating guy B's younger sister
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Randomize
