I don't think brook has ever known best
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
It is NEVER not funny to me when I am sitting at a table and I've touched the dicks of every single person I'm sitting with.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
I’m gonna stop you right there. The last time you had a “brilliant” idea, I woke up to my kitchen covered in flour and a javelin through my tv.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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