I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
I just traded ecstasy for trapeze lessons...you in?
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
