I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
This morning my mouth tasted like fruit trees, battery acid, and magnums. Transferring schools was the best decision Ive ever made.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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