my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
NoShamevember. You game?
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
Nobody will take a lit match to your nipple without warning you this time. Pinky swear.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Randomize
