I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
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