so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
My financial aid advisors would be so pissed if they knew I was spending my loan money on strippers
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! I SAID I WANTED SOMEONE CLASSY AND INSTEAD YOU SET ME UP WITH A GUY THAT JUST TOLD ME HIS FAVORITE PLACE TO FUCK IS ON HIS SWAMPBOAT “THE SLAMHOG!”
I DON’T WANT TO FUCK IN A SWAMP
First of all, his AIR boat is named “Slam Hog” not “The Slamhog.” Second, it’s top of the line. Third, don’t dismiss swamp sex before you try it!
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