doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Randomize
