would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Randomize
