I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
apparently the secret to your success is patron
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
Randomize
