Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
I put so much effort into my vagina today. If i don't get laid tonight I'm gonna be pissed.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Randomize
