I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
I've shit my pants 4 times in 12 hours... Never trust a fart when u pass 30
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
this is an emotional support booty call
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize
