Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
