doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
We opted you as the sacrificial dick tonight. We need our patron cafe. Go make some moves.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
Randomize
