Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Nothing like hearing "I found your pinky nail" before you even noticed it was missing.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
Welp last night I made out with the guy who slices my deli meat at publix. I'm sure there's a joke there but I'm too hungover to find it. Go noles.
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
Oh honey. I will not JUST be drunk. I will be spring break drunk. Spectacularly hammered. It will be glorious for all watching and embarrassing for anyone that has to drag me to bed.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
Randomize
