I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
I just woke up to me licking the dognuts
You mean Doughnuts?
......No :(
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
the table of underagers at this wedding were seated 10ft from the open bar. currently 30 open containers on the table for 5 people. dinner hasn't even been served yet.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
false alarm, still single
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Randomize
