Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
And whoever invented the condom should be put to death.
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Randomize