if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
It never makes you rethink your life choices when you're breaking into my apartment at 3 am to take a piss in my kitchen sink?
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
I should have known when she mixed malibu and V8. It smelled just like tanning oil and when she drank it she said "Oh well, not the first time."
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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