if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
I swear I only fuck him for the huge bottle of smart water he gives me afterwards.
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