he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
either way he was missing a nipple.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
I think that's the key to being an adult though... Get those rapid fire beer shits out I the way early, then you can go about your grown man business
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
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